November 28, 2012

the clarity i wish for...


The Wishcasting Wednesday question Jamie Ridler asks today is: What clarity do you wish for?

This question really hit home for me, because just yesterday I made the final decision about what my word for 2013 will be - my 2013 word is Clarity.

I've never done too well with making New Years resolutions. But the concept of choosing a word for the year resonates strongly with me. Last year I had no problem at all choosing my word. My word actually chose me. Last year, months before 2011 ended, my 2012 word grabbed me and wouldn't let go. I knew, without a doubt, my 2012 word would be Nourish.

This year has been different. No word chose me months ago, leaving no room for doubt. As November got underway, every so often I would think to myself: hmm, I still don't know my word for 2013. I didn't stress about it, though, and I didn't even do anything like meditate or journal about it. I believed my word would appear and I would somehow know it was the one.

And it wasn't as though no words came up as possibilities. There were a few that floated to the surface. Important words for me. Words I need to focus on. Words I need to dive into with my life. Words that need to truly become integrated into my daily living.

Trust. Nurture. Hope. Joy. Clarity. Flow. Abundance.

But which would it be?

Over the past few days, as these words floated around, I started feeling a difference in my heart and solar plexus chakras whenever the word clarity came up.

And then, driving home yesterday afternoon, the various words were lightly tumbling in my mind... and all of a sudden I just KNEW. Knew without a doubt. Knew that, despite how important those other words are for me, my 2013 word had been chosen.

Clarity.


I want (and I need) more clarity.

I want clarity around my life's purpose.

I want clarity about the work I do.

I want clarity around my writing.

I want clarity about what I offer with my work and my business.

I want clarity about where to place my focus.

I want clarity about certain important relationships.

I want clarity about where to invest my money, time, and energy.

I want clarity about how to fully be my best and most authentic self.

Clarity already exists for me - to one extent or another - in each of these areas. But I want more clarity. I want less confusion, less going back-and-forth about what to do and what direction to go, less murkiness.

And less self-doubt.

This year has resulted in gaining SO much clarity... and yet, the gaining of that clarity has illuminated how more clarity is needed. It's a process for me. Cycles of gaining clarity, and then either feeling like I've lost it again or (quite often) the new-found clarity takes me to a new place on my path and I realize I need another dose of clarity about this new place where I find myself.

So it's not that I have no clarity. I do. I've gained incredible clarity this year.

But I wish for more.

Clarity wants my attention too -  and that's why, finally, in the car driving home yesterday, my 2013 word grabbed hold and said This is your focus for the year! It's me! I'm right here! Clarity!

I know, from experience, finding clarity can be a long and winding and sometimes difficult process. And at other times, it comes in a flash, a moment of vivid intuitive knowing.

But whatever way it comes, and however long it takes, it's worth it.

Clarity about my life... ALL of my life - that's what I wish for.